Got myself and the Kid all dressed and ready to have a meet and greet with society after a couple of weeks of sequestered to the house.
But here's what was really going on behind all the "glitz and glamour" (ok, it might be more like "cute and comfortable" - emphasis on comfortable. But dressed none the less!).....
- The cute sunglasses were there to hide the horrible bags under my eyes. If I were catching a flight that day, I guarantee they wouldn't have let me check all that luggage!
- My naturally-colored, blonde hair was pulled back into a deliberate, messy, half ponytail. Only the natural blonde color was with the help of baby powder to the scalp because I haven't washed my hair in 3 days. The half ponytail...also because I haven't washed my hair in 3 days.
- The stylish, summer peep-toe espadrilles that make me feel like I could walk a runway were merely out of necessity. Considering that only the first 2 toes of each foot were painted with trendy polish, there was no point in wearing flops. Also, they give the illusion that my legs might be longer than the stumps they really are. Therefore, making the 4 pounds I have gained appear to have been dispersed evenly over my body...not just to my gut.
- The perfectly placed clothing was picked with extreme thought to detail. The detail being all the hair that needs to be shaved off. Now that we haven't taken the boat out for a couple of weeks, well you can tell the second I put on a skirt or tank top. My body is not a wonderland...it's a calendar marking how cruel time is to me.
- The latest fad of nail polish color was chosen for being fashionable, but mostly because I was too lazy to take off the last color of polish I used. And since my fingernails looked like I use Brillo pads when I wash my hands, it was time to do something.
So there you have it. At a quick glance, you may look at me and think that I'm put together, when the truth is I more "glued" together...maybe a hodge -podge of sorts. But for me....that's real life!
What tricks do you do so you can bare going public?
This is too funny!
ReplyDeleteI love how real you are!
"a calendar marking how cruel time is to me." almost made me pee my half-incontinent, pee anytime I laugh or sneeze self!
ReplyDeleteGood to "see" you anyway!
Mimi
Glad to see that I'm not the only one "glued" together when running errands..
ReplyDeleteI use a lot of the same tricks that you use! We do what we have to do!
ReplyDeleteI'd say Less is more. Blusher and sunglasses (if it's sunny, otherwise I'll just look worse!).
ReplyDeleteLove design, amazing blog :) If you want to follow each other...just tell me:X
ReplyDeleteFashionSpot.ro
Thiѕ is а tool thаt allοwѕ you tο trace аn existing
ReplyDeleteаѕked questions and infοгmation on using acеll phοnе boostertо improve the clarity of уouг
ρhone calls аnԁ the rеceptіon of your mobilе phοnе.
Cheсk out my blοg post :: dien thoai
merely chooѕе gangѕter online games are suсh
ReplyDeleteаѕ Omerta, gentleωoman gangster, and Amеrican mоbster.
Also visit my hοmepagе - fitness.org.ua
Thanks for the good writeup. It actually was a
ReplyDeleteenjoyment account it. Glance complex to more brought agreeable from
you! However, how could we be in contact?
Also visit my web page; Waist Hip Ratio